Michael Gove hates Scots

A Stab in the Dark is a satirical show broadcast on Channel 4 in 1992. Basically a vehicle for David Baddiel but also featured Michael Gove in a ‘comedic’ role which strains the term ‘comedic’. For years it’s been a bit of an obscure joke in comedy fandom circles for featuring Gove, and an episode which featured Jimmy Savile which will never be repeated.

Gove, frankly, drains any life the show has from the air which is remarkable as there’s no life in the programme as it really is awful straddling the ‘serious’ Channel 4 and the radical Channel 4 of the early 90’s. There’s a handy YouTube compilation of Gove’s stuff and I warn you, it is appalling.

One clip came to light this week where he tears into Scots. Yes, Michael Gove is Scottish but he’s that strain of Scot who looks at his fellow countrypeople with contempt because they aren’t all like him, or ‘professional’ as he puts it.

Now 1992 was a tough year for a lot of people in Scotland. On my frequent trips to London you’d hear more and more Scottish accents as tent cities grew and grew on London’s Embankment. Things were bad but instead of seeing people in distress looking for help as they hit bottom, Gove’s instinctive reaction is to sneer and mock.

And this isn’t the only thing that comes out of this programme. There’s an extraordinary clip where he discusses talks with the IRA in a way that had we listened to Gove, we’d never had peace in Ireland.but Gove has made it clear the Good Friday Agreement should never have happened. See Gove is a hardline Unionist who would drag us into hell with nothing but contempt for people who don’t fit his standards and this man could well be Prime Minister by the end of July.

Michael Gove falls over

Michael Gove is the sort of person and politician who, if we lived in a sane sensible country, would be flogged to death on The One Show and his bones buried in sacred ground to ensure he never came back from the dead but we live in a country where talentless bastards like Gove fail upwards.

So in commemoration of his frankly insane comments that Brexit voters weren’t motivated by racism when he himself played upon that racism, and the unofficial start of Better Together 2, here’s Gove falling on his arse.

Here it is again

And again

In the months ahead things are going to get tougher but we’ll still have this moment we can all laugh at to make us feel something as the Tory boot smashes into our faces…

Brexit Breakdown-The Day After Chilcot

It is the day after the Chilcot Report was released damning Tony Blair forever as not just everything we thought he was, but actually worse as even now he spins to an inch of his life invoking 911, indulging in conspiracy theories and trying to spread blame where he can. Meanwhile his Blairite followers wake up today in force to attack figures likes Alex Salmond, Caroline Lucas and Jeremy Corbyn who spoke out so totally against Blair and Labour.

My only hope some of them perhaps watch this Mitchell and Webb sketch and realise where in history they now stand as they’re not on the side of what’s good or right.

Meanwhile the Tories fight among themselves to see who’ll be the next Prime Minister. We have Michael Gove, a sack of skin that somehow thinks it can act human. Andrea Ledsom, the sort of person who gives idiots a bad name and Teresa May who makes Torquemada look like Tony Benn.


So a fortnight after the EU Referendum we’re seeing Sterling drop to levels not seen in decades, companies arranging to close down parts of their operations in the UK, a possible second independence referendum in Scotland, EU Nationals rights being thrown around like confetti, a Tory leadership contest that places the chance of someone to the right of Cameron or Osborne in power and a potential Labour split because part of the party still thinks they were right with Blair and the deaths of up to a million people are things to casually dismiss.

And oh, there’s still a government governing and they’re still fucking us over, plus Portugal got to the final of Euro 2016 even though they’re one of the worst teams I’ve seen in the last four of an international competition in some time.

Just imagine what it’s going to be like when things really get bad?

Brexit Breakdown-This Vicious Cabaret

Michael Gove made his seemingly never-ending speech launching his bid to become Tory Party leader, and be default, our next Prime Minister. That’s Michael Gove. This man.


After Boris Johnson shitting himself and running away bravely, we’re left with a realistic choice between Michael Gove (a rampant Unionist who is utterly inept) and Teresa May (a rampant Unionist, who is sociopath and utterly inept) as next Tory leader and by default, the next UK Prime Minister. Except you and I won’t get a choice, only Tory MP’s and the Tory membership get a choice. See when Gove said ‘he’d stop unelected elites gaining control’? Yeah, he was lying because neither of the main two candidates intend holding a general election so we don’t get a say as to the new direction of the government til 2020.

But they got elected last year’ you may, correctly and also stupidly say. Both Gove and May in their opening campaign declarations make it clear they’re both veering to the far right of the Tory Party. Both are scary people for some of the same and different reasons, but here we are now. The established political class of the Tory Party are about to fight over who gets handed the job to negotiate the UK’s exit from the EU, and oh, both May and Gove suggest the rights of EU nationals can be used as an negotiating tool with the EU. Let that sink in for a second. This isn’t fantasy but a real possible thing that may happen. People we all know and love may be used as pawns to get what Gove and May want from the EU. It should sicken anyone but in post Brexit Britain anything now seems possible, even if it’s near fascism.

100 years ago the Battle of the Somme started. Lives were lost, and wasted as a bloated British establishment fought with whomever to cement their place in the world and a century later a bloated British establishment fights with whomever to cement their place in the world. All the lessons learnt and battles won over 100 years are going unless we fight for it because there’s nothing much left for us to do.

So when politicians use the slaughter of a century ago to build the myth of post Brexit Britain, remember the truth. I leave you with the words of the writer Pat Mills (lifted from his Facebook page), the man who wrote the peerless Charley’s War. They’re worth remembering as we enter a dangerous new phase for us all.


Thanks to everyone for your thoughts on Charley’s War. It still means so much to me, so much so that I don’t trust myself to think about it too much. Because it is SUCH an emotional subject.
Today is a tragic anniversary when the ‘Best of British’ were murdered by the British ruling class. Because it was Britain that started WW1 -for which there is overwhelming and documented evidence (E.D. Morel and others). Not Germany and all that lying Balance of Power tripe they told us at school. That’s about as truthful as Tony Blair’s reasons for invading Iraq.
It’s heartbreaking to see the murder of a generation still remembered as ‘heroic sacrifice’ by the descendants of that same ruling class.
Any voice of dissent is still – with shameful calculation – removed. For example, the words of Harry Patch, the Last Tommy of WW1, who, unfortunately for the establishment, was a pacifist.
It’s worsened in recent years with the Battle of the Somme now being described as a victory, and General Haig as a hero. Shame on the historians and the establishment for lying about our noble forefathers. They deserve better.

Brexit Breakdown-This Bastard’s Carnival

Boris Johnson is not going to stand for Tory leader and by default, the next Prime Minister of the UK. All of the mess in regards Brexit was because Johnson wanted the PM’s job and shat David Cameron up so much he got forced into an alley and had to call a referendum, and now rather than be part of cleaning up the mess he’s caused he’s decided to slink off into the background to become the most hated man in the UK which must make Gary Glitter breathe a sigh of relief for a while.

Of course Johnson would have fucked things up but if you break it, you fix it, now we have realistically either Teresa May or Michael Gove as next Tory leader and Prime Minister because neither will call an election although both will take the Tories on a new direction that makes what we’ve seen under Cameron seem like a breeze. As someone who was so recently crapping themselves working out what type of cancer they had I can only say this feels exactly like that. Actually, it’s worse because I may be cleared of cancer but either of this pair will fuck us over with no hope of recovery. We have a succession of Tories fighting to become their Adam Susan.

There will be no general election, so all you lefty types that voted to leave hoping that would happen I hope you’re happy. We’ve got a choice between a Tory that wants rid of human rights, has introduced the Snooper’s Charter and gave us the racist van¬†or a Tory that’s backed by Paul Dacre and Rupert Murdoch who is such a hardcore Unionist he’d risk the Good Friday Agreement.

The fallout of the Brexit vote is enormous. Imagine now a UK being rewritten in the image of Michael Gove and Teresa May. Don’t be black, poor, Muslim, gay, Scottish,Irish, Welsh, working class, disabled, or anything that won’t conform to their vision of a ‘proud’ ‘one-nation’ Britain where the Tories have everything under control and the masturbating imp of UKIP sit on their shoulder pushing them evermore over to the far right.

But today belongs to Boris Johnson. A coward who broke the country, broke people’s lives and destroyed the future of millions of people alive now and yet to be born, but didn’t want to take responsibility for what he did. Only his constituents now get a say on his future while we all get to pick up the mess that started on the playing fields of Eton decades ago.

So there’s only one song to close this….

Michael Gove wants to rewrite history

This is the UK’s education secretary Michael Gove.

He’s one of those Scottish Tories who legged it from Scotland as he’d never get elected there, so got a nice safe Tory seat in England. He’s also a horrendous human being who if you saw on fire, you’d want to find lighter fluid on just to make sure the fucker burned. He’s been responsible for a series of frankly mental policies and comments since he was shat into office.

The latest is this astonishing piece about WW1 where Gove basically rewrites the history of the First World War from something that has been accepted for 90 odd years, and was shaped by many who fought in the bloody thing. Calling the Battle of the Somme:

Even the battle of the Somme, once considered the epitome of military futility, has now been analysed in depth by the military historian William Philpott and recast as a precursor of allied victory.

Except Gove avoids mentioning the controversy over Philpott’s views, or how it doesn’t match with any other historical viewpoint of the Somme, which was and is, a senseless massacre of human life. What repainting it as an ‘allied victory’ does is paint the sacrifice of life, especially working class men and boys, as something which is part of a greater good. That’s exceptionally dangerous revisionism as it means that any future or indeed, current government would consider a similar loss of life to be justified.

Gove’s idea that General Haig was a ‘patriotic leader’ or that the view the First World War was a pointless war where men were led by donkey’s was a ‘left wing’ view is ridiculous when the person who most cemented this view in the late 20th Century is Alan Clark in his excellent book, The Donkeys.

Blaming Blackadder for the fact WW1 was a slaughter is appalling. Rewriting WW1 as a proud moment for the British Empire is disgusting. Rewriting history so children get a revisionist’s view of history filtered through an Imperialists eye is wrong.

Write to your MP. Write to Gove and David Cameron. Make your opinion clear, and make it blunt that this man;s vile revisionism and glorification of slaughter is not to be tolerated. We cannot tolerate WW1 being made into something we celebrate.

I’d imagine Gove would never have said this to Harry Patch when he was alive.