The Walking Dead and why spoiler culture is for wankers

The Walking Dead has returned to tell us just whose skull was smashed in by the new villain Negan at the end of season six back in the spring.We’ve had months and months of wondering as to who gets offed.


As I live in the UK, I couldn’t watch the opening episode of season seven live, so using a Magic Crystal Device, I had the episode primed to watch after I got in from work. Problem is that in 2016 it is incredibly hard to avoid spoilers and lo and behold the episode was spoiled. Not massively. Just enough to diffuse some of the tension in what is a pretty bloody (emphasis on the bloody) tense, and excellent episode.

Now, you may say it was my fault. I should have avoided social media but when your newsfeed spits out details we’re at the worst of spoiler culture. I’m not talking about the bitter wee idiots crying because XXX has had their brains smashed out and how they’ll never watch the programme again. They’re just pricks. I’m talking about people, or news organisations who deliberately leak spoilers knowing that in the year 2016, fans of that thing will see it come up in their newsfeed whether they want it or not.

There’s an episode of an old British sitcom called Whatever Happened to the Likely Lads where the two main characters spend the day trying to avoid the result of a football match. That’s comedy derived from the fact we know there’s a time limit on spoilers, even back in the pre-digital age. But for people to take obvious joy in feeding out spoilers while claiming it as a badge of honour just, frankly, makes them utter wankers. Not knowing what happens ruins what the makers of a film, TV series, etc intended which is for people to come to a work fresh. Ruining it for others just makes you a wanker’s wanker. We’re talking up with wankers like Nigel Farage or Donald Trump.

Anyhow, the opening episode is immense. I especially liked the bit where Wolverine has a fight with some zombies, that looked brilliant!

DC Comics films cheer up, Kong: Skull Island made me wet my pants and The Walking Dead cast laugh at us because of Brexit

San Diego Comic Con hit its Big Day yesterday with the infamous Hall H throwing out big presentations one after another. This is a day where people queue for up to a day beforehand to get in sleeping in each others sweat and filth in order to be within 200 metres of their heroes. If they’re lucky of course.

First up was Warner Brothers who came out like an alcoholic who’s just went clean and who wants to tell you about it. One of the rightful criticisms of Warner’s DC Comics films is they’re too dark and miserable to the point where Batman Versus Superman ended up being a masochistic exercise in misery rather than anything fun. So first up, Wonder Woman.

It looks alright, the WW1 setting is odd because that was a much more complex war to portray on screen than WW2 because you can’t just depict a complex war based upon imperialism as easily as Goodies killing Nazis. Still is does give it a different look though at some point even the most rabid fan has to deal with the fact Gal Gadot can’t act.

Next up; Justice League.

There’s more fun in the nearly three minute trailer than the entire of the aforementioned Batman Versus Superman, plus Man of Steel combined. That doesn’t make a great film though but this has got such a low starting point in terms of expectations a light, fun superhero film would be a masterpiece.

As for Suicide Squad..

I dunno, it looks fun but it also looks as if a committee of accountants have poured over every Marvel film of the last decade and come up with a film.

The main event for a Giant Monster fan like myself is Kong: Skull Island.

Godzilla was alright but far too dull in places. The Peter Jackson King Kong remake was overlong and tedious, but this promises less of a boring time at the cinema which a giant monster film shouldn’t be.

There were other film Warner Brothers presented but J.K Rowling can fuck off.

Marvel also produced loads of stuff but unlike Warners they didn’t release them directly online and that might keep the thousands of smelly, sweaty fans in Hall H happy, but it doesn’t stop piracy. Ah well, here’s the Doctor Strange trailer with Benedict Cumberbatch’s iffy American accent.

One of the things that’s clear is that the big media companies have honed how they use San Diego to their benefit which benefits those us sat on our arses thousands of miles away, but perhaps make the experience of those actually there a bit less special. However sticking most of the big panels online more or less within 24 hours of them happening means we can get to see things like the cast of The Walking Dead (well, a couple of them) taking the piss out of the UK because of Brexit.

Even people whose job is playing someone in a post apocalyptic world where mindless zombies eat people thinks Brexit is a bad idea…

So with that in mind I’m off to watch the Aliens 30th anniversary panel without smelling like a tramps old socks.